“Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens against violence.” – John Dulles
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Pun-ishment!

1. Small Change

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.”
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2. The Price Of Gas In France

A thief in Paris planned to steal some Paintings from the Louvre. After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied:

“Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.”

See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else.
I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse!

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“If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection.” – Romans 6:5

No one falls in love by choice; it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance; it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance; it is by CHOICE


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The Church Gossip

Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose in to other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extracurricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Elmer, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Elmer (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know exactly what he was doing!

Elmer, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny... he said nothing.

Later that evening, Elmer quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred's house... walked home . . . and left it there all night.

You gotta; love Elmer! :)

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“The only good is knowledge, and the only evil is ignorance.”
– Chinese proverb

“. . . and they both have many children!” – Mary Jane Preston

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“Service means an unceasing and wholehearted labor in making ourselves available to Jesus so that He may live, in and through us, His life of infinitely tender, compassionate and merciful love, for the spiritually and materially poorest of the poor.”
Mother Teresa, Heart of Joy

MATTHEW 10:32
“Therefore, whoever confesses Me before men, him I will also confess before My Father who is in heaven.”
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PUN-ISHMENT:
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.' Ooooooh!

Clean Humor: The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo) is not just an athlete. She is now a nurse currently working at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital. She is not permitted to answer the hospital telephones. It caused too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, “Picabo, ICU.”

Hmmmmm!

"It does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless, minority; keen to set brush fires in people's minds.” – Samuel Adams